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Saturday 21 September 2013

Palace Rejects iOS 7

Just days after the introduction of the much awaited new version of iOS, there has been a backlash, our Apple correspondent reports.  Many early adopters are claiming that they do not like the new look interface, with its no fuss icons and simple gestures.  Many are ruing the fact they failed to read the small print that stated that the upgrade was not reversible, or indeed the several pop up warnings.  Or the many reports on the internet stating in big bold headlines that this was an irreversible process.

The backlash has now been reported to have angered Her Majesty the Queen, who publically started to use the iPad in public just a few months ago, although observers close to the crown have shrugged it off as just an iPad 2.  Not even a regal retina display to check Ones emails on, apparently.

The adoption of Apple products was hardly a smooth process - apparently an Apple advocate was urging the Royal Family to swing behind the interface for some time.  Normally Her Majesty makes a point of supporting British products, but since the demise of the Sinclair Spectrum in the 1980s that has proven to be a difficult path.  Apple would have won the Royal approval race sooner with the launch of the iPhone several years ago if it hadn't been for a poorly chosen statement by an Apple employee who suggested that being seen with the right phone opens doors for influential people.  Her Majesty was overheard to mutter that she had footmen for that role, thank you.

But behind the scenes the iPad has been very popular, especially with the grandchildren spun to the far reaches of the Empire such as Afghanistan and Anglesey.  Facetime has become a regular feature of the Royal Household and the report that the new interface had an improved routine for managing photographs may have urged Her Majesty or at least Her Royal Highness' chief ICT flunky to upgrade.

Except, if you read the small print you'll find that the new interface doesn't support the new software on the older iPhones and iPads, so those of you who were hoping to free up your finite storage space by shifting those photos of the last Ambassadors Ball, or the hundreds of boring garden party photographs to give Ones iPad the space to breathe will have been disappointed.  Especially if One upgraded and found that, actually, One does like the skuermorphisms that have actually driven the appeal for the iPhone, iPod and iPad over the last few years and now find One cannot revert to them.

Most of us will lick our wounds - someone will find a way to roll back to iOS6, although many would prefer to go back at least one release further if given the chance - and eagerly await iOS 8.  The big question is whether Sir Jony Ives will be invited to produce that version, especially as it is rumoured that Her Majesty is considering removing his knighthood until he sorts her iPad out, personally.  There's a room waiting at the Tower of London, apparently.  It may be difficult to oversee the development of the new Apple products with Beefeaters outside of his room.

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